PASTS

Pasts are parts of us which cannot be erased of .

Duck face, or maybe not.

I believe i don't have much of ugly pasts.
Even if i do , i'm dare to face it.

People who don't and trying to run away from it ,
i shall call it coward.
People who pretend they don't care but still having it deep down in the mind,
it's a shame.

Talking about people,
i shall have a lot to blog in the next post.

I'm too tired. See ya.

Hello

From National geographic 2011

Like my thoughts.
Dreams ? oh pipe-dreams.

Chances

I am fierce

Hello I'm Wei Wei . I was a childish kid who could grumble about anything and speak fire to you until a war starts. Now i have changed and become more softly and think before i speak.I do things properly and seriously because i was working in hospital and i found out a mistake might cost a life.I love everybody and i'm sorry if i have ever hurt you.

Will you give me a chance for not to judge me as who was i before?

Fighting

Yes this's a stolen pic under permission :P
LOVE THIS.
The only thing i don't like about this pic is the focus point
Captured by Yong Mun Hong :P

I once have a lot of thing without a need to fight for
Princess temper was the sickness, or sometimes you call it stubbornness and unreasonable
I am not gonna change for who i am
I'm gonna make my sickness benefits myself

Princess is demanding ,or you may call her a total bitch
Yes for the bitchy spirit , i demand for what i want
I am gonna get what i want
I am gonna succeed


Princess is a child. I am gonna grow up.
I am a Queen. :D


Have you ever felt in a way that ,
the teacher favors your friends more than you because he thinks that you're weaker?
He is not gonna ask about your result like any others do because he is considerate
I felt it once.
He only asked me once , i didn't answer. And it was the last time he ever asked me about my marks.

In fact , i scored A everytime, sometimes i got 100marks,which is at the same level of the people he favored, or sometimes even better.
The only time he asked me was the only time i got a B. so i shut up.
How sad it is?

yeah i don't know a reason for my self-expectation
I didn't get straight As , i too shut up.

For a reason to prove my value ,
I'm gonna stop the lazy bones in me,
and start cracking the brain.

Keep Fighting .

Love what you choose

Studying actuarial science SOA first paper.
Hahahaha so far... I am interested.
Btw the theorem for the beginning part of section is already covered in A-level.
 :D

THE ANCIENTS

Ancient is ancient.

Dear

Hmmmmn.

Mind tweeet.

Look younger

I know me.
Although princess time is long over,
little princess still stays in me.

I can't stand the life being too inconvenient from City.
How tempting environmental engineering is to me..
i shall forget.

I remember my senior, Yvonne, who wanted to do Vet in the first place ,switched course to Law because she couldn't get into. Then, she got khazanah scholarships to study in University of Cambridge, UK.



There's always an option.

Who knows i can do great in actuary ? Provided i can get a job in future. haha.
how optimistic.

说到底 还不是钱

我想哭了

刚刚突然停电 让我突然很得空地在床上仔细的想
我为什么会拿A-level

SPM的时候 我的first choice 是 Nutrition
然后poly 又很热
我又很幸运的拿到我的first choice在 Nanyang Poly
我其实只选两间来放
我有放SP 可是我不懂发什么神经放Aerospace engineering
-__-''

当时还小 我又比较慢熟
然后又被ENGINEERING吸引到 JPA interview也去了
然后我决定拿 A-LEVEL , 因为我的目标是NTU
比较快 又可以避免我乱乱去读一个COURSE

可是 我忘了我的目标
我成绩真的不好 （我有 C )
我没有了梦想 没有了目标
我看到很多人很不幸 我很想捐钱帮助他们
我很想现在助养儿童 可是又怕妈妈会骂

然后我又喜欢数学 所以我要拿精算
做得好 我会变有钱
虽然市场很快会saturated with this job

我还是很想做environmental engineer
UTAR kampar 有  可是太远了

可是..... 我真的爱这科吗？
真的喜欢会怕距离吗？

当初会要ENVIRONMENTAL的我。。
真的是因为我很爱树 大自然 和动物
很幼稚不是？

还有
现在的我 长大了 会想了
可是 拿完A-LEVEL 的我
要读精算的我
和当初乱选COURSE的我

有什么不一样？

Lol.

Yumcha with Sir today .Listened a lot about developers and how investment works.
About my course...

*showing course modules of environmental technology*

"hmmmm look good'

*showing career opportunities stated on the website *

'' Okay. Jobless"

Lol.

Disqualified Zombie's food

Copied from Facebook

I see many people posting about this.

I feel so annoyed. WHY?
This is rude.










Admit or not , everybody judges, conscious or subconscious.
I don't think i need to state an example for this.

Are you sure you aren't a dog ?
Why are you calling yourself one publicly .

SAD is the word.

a day visiting Kay eon.

My decision is shaken again.

Actuarial science vs environmental technology.



I am not fine.

SMILE

Practicing how to smile -_-''

Still ugly. =__=
Whatever this blog does not go to the public >__<

NTU , NUS , SUTD
Dreams are finally shattered for sure.

Many things are beyond our control.
This is just a part of life , a part of my journey
I am not gonna live sadly just because i can't go to my dream school

Dear weiwei, love yourself more.

AT LEAST,you publicize your dream schools almost everyday until many of your friends are applying it right?


cheers. I love WWC.

Pasts

I love Mayday since their first album - when i was still in primary

I love it so much until i influence people around us

Mic, who doesn't know how to sing Mayday, knows how to sing now

Haukit, my ex, from a boy who only listens to english song, to someone who will buy their original albums

Now, this song, got me again.

Mayday , 2012

谁 把 愉 快 的 愉      换 偷 穷 的 偷

难 道 自 找 的 找      是 自 我 的 我

终 于 未 来 的 未        变 末 日 的 末

我 们 啊 是 先 坠 落         或 先 坠 入 自 甘 堕 落

Disposable

Taken by Rober Doisneau
Merry-go-round is always my favourite

Sometimes i feel like i am a wreck.

I like everybody. I really do.
I forgive and forget.

If i am wrong, i'm sorry
When i am not wrong, i am still sorry.

I am the first to say sorry to my friends.


But sincerity is always trampled .

A girl who doesn't care ....she's not longer exist.

Robert Doisneau

Taken by Robert Doisneau

What you would do when you love something very much. 

Doesn't it mean something?

We are lack of passion in our daily lives.

I don't have passion in anything , nothing.

It inspires me .

I am gonna build my passion from the flat. 

Yes thank you. :)

Thanks google too. Happy 100th birthday Robert Doisneau :)

No good

This picha is totally irrelevant. I find that my life
has been great recently until i don't find any photo to
celebrate my sadness.

Dreams are broken into pieces. I am not fine.
SUTD does not want me.

Closet Show Room

Irene is like, super pretty seh
*kk is pretty too !
Jogoya,May 2011?

Rummaging the closet called memoirs.

Awww mixed feeling ! <3

This was the time we had really large group
guys, i really miss ya'all

i look thinner
June 2011?

Bumbu Bali, Puchong

I am actually trying to convey that..

I look thinner before.

oh darned. -_-

HAHAHA yesh i wuliao =_=

You don't think the same

Tangles-of-love is closed until further notice. Haha.

i am not going to update about what i do much in this blog but what do i think

I don't think anybody would like to know about my thoughts so there's no 'sharing' for the blog links

By the way, i still feel privacy is intruded for letting people to read this. Haha.

Somehow, if you're happened to be reading this, you must be having a big crush on me ? :P

Maco Bakery,i actually asked for pikachu -_-

Alright. I played more than i had ever done in my life.
I went to here and there and had delicious food
Life's so awesome.

I am worried about my future.
Alright. Despite the fact that i would love to go Subang to join all the besties....i decide to do actuarial science in UTAR.

I too had some prejudices about UTAR because it is really cheap. I didn't like public universities too.But something changed my mind.

I saw friends who are doing Bachelor in public universities get to go overseas to see building/construction at subsidized price.
I got to know that renown developer such as SP Setia are all sending engineers into UTAR instead of private schools.
Veterinarians from UPM are so good too.

""Nobody is interested on how many As you have, but how much do you earn per month.''
- an insurance agent once told me.

I wonder if actuarial science would be a good choice for me.
But..never try, never know right?

Sigh. Another day has passed like that. I shall apply thingy now.

see ya. :)

Bitter tit-bits

Starbucks,LCCT

I don't feel good right now.
This post was supposed to be blogging about my happy days for the Port Dickson Trip with friends and hanging out yumcha in INTI.

It was really random.
Sally was not going to bring me to MACO bakery today and
i was just being me, posted on mic's wall in fb complaining about
her, for fun, of course.

Time line is kinda stupid.
I saw 'Denise Jiamin' in the mutual friends column of mic's profile
I clicked into it ,Just to see how my ex was doing.






Awkwardly, he was the only one i loved before. Then now you see how dead i am right now
They were baking brownies together, going for trips together.....exactly doing what he had promised to me
Just with a different girl .

I feel sour. Yes i do. I have got over him but....this feeling is so indescribable.
Parts of my getting-over process were making myself obsessed with the hurt done by Kenny.
I don't love Kenny. I was just....bad and couldn't stand a bf who didn't pamper me .
I almost let him have me - just to lure him out to see me. Luckily i didn't.
This was the only good thing in the junk.

And for what Kenny had done to me , i did it to another person too.
Later on i realized what i was doing and ended it immediately ( In my own way to make him detest me)
I succeed. I felt bad, i felt very very bad.

I became a person who i had never thought i would become.
Sometimes i would become close to people who like me ,
Sometimes out of conscience, i would run as far as possible .

And somewhere deep inside me, i was hoping Hau Kit could ever come back,
and change me into the girl he was once in love before.

Anyway, i don't have time for the lovey-dovey stuff.
These were just....thoughts.
I miss him wholeheartedly . I am not sure whether it was him i am missing of, or the memories he has given.

Daddy pig, I'm sorry.

Life versus Dream

When i was doing for SPM exam, i had the feeling that i might not be able to score straight As.

When the headmistress was announcing the straight As in my school, i was sitting at the back of the hall holding my phone,although i don't remember whom was the one i sms-ed to.

Then,i was called upon the stage, as the last one who got straight As in my school

Surprised more than happy. then happy and very very happy.

My boyfriend was there with me.He was younger than me by a year but having the height of 180 and the brain which is smarter than mine, he didn't make any difference.I shared the happiness with him,i was happy.

Later on,he accompanied me for almost all the education fair i went,which i appreciated a lot.

I got the interview from JPA , i offended the panel in my way.I still remembered he asked me about female and male on the engineering path.Har, i was a female there, and together with all the interviewees and the panels who were all males...well. 

Then,i got the scholarships from INTI for A-level - entirely free from tuition fees.So why not?

however, luck ended here.

I broke up with my secondary school bf who sacrificed so much for me.

I was thinking A-level was easy, 4 subjects only. So i didn't really spend time on books.

I did what i like,according to my mood but brain.

I couldn't blame those people who made me spend time on crying rather than studying.

It was my own fault in failing to control my own emotions and priority.

Prides came first and then every went wrong.

I screwed up for my A-level. I know some might think that i failed them because i kept on saying bad and secret. Alright, i didn't fail. I just didn't get straight As, i was embarrassed for myself and that is it.

B is already a failure.so i am very much of a failure.i am not able to get scholarships anymore.

I was so depressed. My family now i kind of having some sorts of problem so i am not able to go overseas.Despite the overwhelming feeling of sadness, i still try hard to find any sponsorships,scholarships or  loan or etc. Until now, i gave up officially. No more searching . No more waiting.

My dream was to study in NTU or NUS. Then i ended it with my own hands.

My life is now a mess and no matter how hard i try to fix it

i can't. 

Martin Luther King Jr once said, ''Only in darkness can you see the stars''

I don't see it now. I need a getaway.

Now, i am running away from the reality. I reject to face life and dream. I lock myself in my own world.

Fly kites with friends, tea time with bestie, or Sunday with family.

Most of the time, i am trapping myself in the novel world, with a coffee as companion.

future?