时间可以带走伤心
也会把甜蜜给冲走


难过 所以哭了
哭了  换不回以前的甜蜜
只会得到眼泪很廉价这个事实

一难过就会出现的那个人不见了
时不时就会whatsapp我他人在哪里的人也不见了
每天睡觉前一定会打给我的他在哪里
就算通了电话  也没有办法聊到我睡着了
知道我难过了 也不会哄我了


我应该适应
还是在一切都甜美的时候留下最美的回忆？

I am 20 years old !

Taken in Ben's
find this meaningful on this special day
what's the one thing about yourself that you'd like to improve on?

It was my birthday yesterday !

at 12am ,

Ninja, Kelly, Banana, Ly Heng, Ke Jo, Alfret and Wee Sheng came to my doorstep for a birthday surprise !

Too bad i was sending Ee Xuen back at that time

Hahahaha

But still managed to surprise me !

(As there were many of them at the doorstep )

:D

Coincidentally, they bought the cake i wanted from delectable !

Lol i wanted to buy one for Stephen's birthday ( which is the next day after mine )

Not because he liked it

but i wanted to eat it

:P

They purposely make the candles like that

haha

i am awesome

Yes there are a lot of babifunnyhilariousOhmygoodness shots that i don't think you wanna see them all

hahahahah

Teehee i am happy

Yes please look at me haha

一号佳丽！

Ben's

The next day, i went for present-hunting for myself in KLCC after my assignment

I wanted Ninja to accompany me then later i decided to have my own adventure 

( i was very emo because stephen was still out of sight ><)

Then Ninja told me she needed to go to KLCC to shop too

then we met there after an hour of shopping on my own!

I had two bags in mind

One Everlast and one Nike

I couldn't make the decision so i waited Ninja to arrive so that at least i can have some opinions

i was texting shuwei all the way for opinions lol

and she said she felt weird for texting her own number

( yes in case you don't know, my sim card is in the toilet bowl)

There are two things that would never change although i have turned 20 years old !

1. Pattern

2. Fatness

>__< 

Belanja myself a good meal on Birthday :)

Ninja was drinking mushroom soup yg amat mahal 

Went to Memory Lane for adventure after exploring the way to get to pavillion from KLCC

Seriously, i had tonnes of fun in Candyliscious !

Ninja: jiayou buddy

Really zha si wo for the creativity hahaha

It is one of the place that no matter how many times did i go

I still find it amazing

XD

Santa, make flower like this for me please

:P

Ninja made me damn paiseh !

From advisor to buyer

>__<

i was still unable to make decision though (lol =_=)

Dear came d, Ninja straight "shoo"一声就不见了

Asked her to watch movie with us...

donwant

Asked her to sit down and eat ice cream with us..

donwant

Stephen offered a ride to send her home

Donwant..

.__.

Watched skyfall with dear + exchanged gift 

:)

This year , i purposely removed my birth date to play low profile :P

I was surprised that there are people who actually remember my birthday

Maybe not all of the gang remember, but they are willing to celebrate the day with me

The sincerity outweighs everything

:D

This might be the warmest birthday i ever had

Thanks guys

I am at loss of words to deliver the thank you message

If you see this,

Please know that i appreciate every effort you did 

For people who actually tried to call me.sorry that i was unable to answer..

(simcard in toiletowl lol )

arhhh this emo zombie queen is happy to have you guys

I love you

xoxo

For more pichas : https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.4794756066252.194825.1216440523&type=3

:)

Happiness

What's happiness ?

 

It's when you have an ice cream to eat

It's when you can always get chocolate to cheer your day

It's when you can walk under the sunshine

It's when you have comfy bed to sleep on

It's when you have a home

It's when you know you will never be alone

They will be always there for you . 

Your family, Your Friends , Your loved ones.

i am happy

;)

i am down

This is the second day i am crying
He has never made me carrying this sadness to the next day.

I am really hurt this time .
Or maybe i should really learn how to let go

"How to let go"?
imagine that you're holding a glass of hot water. When it hurts too much ..you don't have to learn..
you let go by yourself


My tears are worthless.
He was right though. When i cry too often over small things,
my tears get more worthless.

But...all the small things he meant..
are painful to me
will i cry if i am not pain?
will i cry if i don't love him this much?
will i be hurt this much...?

As time goes by , people change ..
tears get worthless ,
care is nowhere
heart get scars

...and be dumped alone at late night sobbing to daybreak again


i don't have this confident that we're able to be back like before
When i was this little queen pampered by him ..
he said he told himself before..once he has a gf, he will make sure she becomes the happiest woman in the world
I did feel that way but i didn't express it .

Michelle once said that i smiled sweetly when i talked about him.
Guess he will never knows...
continue thinking himself will never satisfy me..
i wonder who is the one who thinks negatively at all time

Some thoughts

"Demanding" might be the word you're using now to describe me

My mom said it stubborn.

When i want something , i must get it .

When i don't get it from my loved one when they are unable to get,

i will be sad for awhile, and get it my away 

The things i want can be anything . Sometimes it can be just just..

a cup of hot chocolate :P

I behave more like a kid when i am with people who love me..

it just comes naturally and i can't help it

I believe there's a child in everybody

Some people love cartoon , some people can't get rid of their favorite pillow,

Some people like to eat particular snacks or candy

i don't have inner child . I am the child itself. 

Get happy easily, an ice cream can make my day

get down fast too

But it doesn't mean i don't have the ability to think . ( EQ =/= IQ)

I am twenty and i have been through some real tough incidents when teens around my age don't have to endure 

No one knows. I go high profile all the time because i am just uhm purely a 100% attention seeker but uh

i know when is a no to put things under the spotlight.

I do handle my bestie's relationship problem 

People who know me , they will come to me .

If i don't have the ability to think , will you share your problem with me?

It would be a lie if i say i detest no one.

Seriously , i am not into gossiping this kind of shits

People talk about people at all time , what did A do to B and what did C do to D

i am not interested to know , unless you're in trouble

If you ever chit-chat with me, you do know however i dislike a person

I don't take a speaker and announce his/her bad points to the world

Maybe i do tell the 1 or 2 person , who are my besties

And when people ask about stuff i know and i would tell no one

You know it better if you did try to force me to tell you about anything

I always feel disgusted when my loved ones are going out with people i disliked

i think...you too will feel uncomfortable right?

But i won't stop my loved ones from going out with them

they have their freedoms

i dislike A , you don't have to follow

Please note that it is quite hard to be in my 'dislike' list

and when i dislike you , i will make sure you know

It is a childish act , i know.

i don't need to let them know for my own benefit

Of course , i wouldn't do it at workplace to avoid conflicts -_-

but for okay-okay friend, it is still better to let them know

so that he/she wouldn't ask you for meals or anything

About yesterday change of relationship...

i know i was serious

but it is also kind of way to get his attention

I want to know whether he cares...

whether he will tam me or not...

Cried to the death when he agreed.

There's a 'love' behind the world i hate you...*applicable to my best fren and boyfriend only *

Had a chat with yongwei

She said that her bf also did almost the same

We came into this conclusion that..

Break up = i want attention

     &

All guys are noobs. -__-

But he drove here at 3am and reached here around 4am yesterday although he was very tired

:)

kindness

A little story of the day .


I was heading to the water dispenser machine to fill up my 5L bottle . There was a group of youngsters heading there too , they reached the machine first as they were from block A .
*water dispenser machine is located at block A and i was from block B *

They had like , 5/6 people with 6/7 bottles to fill up . I heard a guy whispering to his group
"Shall we let the girl (me)to fill up first ? "
Then the group was giving him a big hint of  ''No".

They seemed like they were not familiar with that machine as they were dumbly adjusting the bottle position
They weren't quite sure about the price too except the guy who wanted to let me first
After waiting for them to fill up patiently , it was finally my turn.

It was just few seconds for me to fill up . Seriously, just a few seconds. maybe less than 10 seconds.
I was waiting for them for like.. 10 minutes?

Typical Malaysians. 

they did nothing wrong - they got there first.
And i found out that normally those Caucasians / people from Middle-east are more 'gentleman'

eg. getting up / down the bus . No people will let u first. Last time when i was taking the INTI bus , an African let me go first . :)

Have you ever had a long queue in the toilet?
Sometimes , people queue in front of the door , not one line at the side so that who comes in first , go first.
if i was forced to line in front of the door and it was very obvious who came in first , i would let the lady who came before me to use it first . Sometimes, people also treat me the same way. It was nice :)

We should be nice to everyone :)

blahh

 So now i am staying alone . The room suddenly becomes so spacious.. I need a room mate !

Today's Lunch 

ABC soup the other day

Cabbage soup the other other day

ABC soup + Chicken with orange sauce + mayo egg the other other other day

I sot liao !

But they taste good , look at the color of the soup teehee
:D